While the joy I experienced as a result of my newfound understanding of grace was profound, it wasn't exactly as if I'd suddenly entered some sort of "happily ever after" fairy tale existence. In the midst of that joy, I still had many questions and issues that needed to be worked through.
Date: 1/29/99 08:57
BTW, my husband and I have been going through your lessons together. Last night I had to officially concede the Sunday Debate. We discussed what this means on a practical level and it turns out that Sundays won't turn into the wild debauchery that I had feared
We also realized that it would be a good idea to have [Eldest Son], the budding legalist, read your lessons. [Husband] told me about one Sunday when he was furtively sweeping up some mess in the garage, only to be discovered by [Eldest Son], who gasped in shock, "But, Daddy! It's SUNDAY!"
I tell you, this freedom stuff is still kinda wild and exhilarating. It seems as if I'm constantly facing the realization, "Oh, Christ set me free from this too!" Just last night I realized an area where I had long been quite Gothardish---and it was so joyous to be rid of yet more shackles.
The sad part of all this is contemplating what this means in terms of our church. It's not like we were ecstatic and you blew it for us by infecting us with your heresy. (Hey, my husband was already infected!) The irony is that a few weeks ago, I was complaining that our pastor wasn't covenantal enough in his theology and now I'm complaining that he's *too* covenantal! There's simply no pleasing me, especially since I keep getting swept away by every wind of doctrine
Seriously, I'm not sure what we will do or where God will lead us. And it's OK, we don't need to decide anything at this point, because it's not like we have to do anything right now. An interesting aside of all this is that I would never baptize my babies today. But I'll leave that whole discussion for another time---because I do have some related questions!