Monday, April 10, 2006

What to do with incestuous pedophiles...

...according to Michael Pearl:
But if your husband has sexually molested the children, you should approach him with it. If he is truly repentant (not just exposed) and is willing to seek counseling, you may feel comfortable giving him an opportunity to prove himself, as long as you know the children are safe. If there is any thought that they are not safe, or if he is not repentant and willing to seek help, then go to the law and have him arrested. Stick by him, but testify against him in court. Have him do about 10 to 20 years, and by the time he gets out, you will have raised the kids, and you can be waiting for him with open arms of forgiveness and restitution. Will this glorify God? Forever. You ask, "What if he doesn't repent even then?" Then you will be rewarded in heaven equal to the martyrs, and God will have something to rub in the Devil's face. God hates divorce -- always, forever, regardless, without exception.
This man is seriously out of touch with reality. How on earth can the children possibly be safe if they have any contact with their abuser at all? Who would even want to "stick by" a man who had not only committed adultery but incest and pedophilia? "Have him do about 10 to 20 years"? Since when will the courts allow the wife to determine the length of the sentence? Open arms of forgiveness and restitution? Just because a woman forgives someone does not mean she is required to invite him back into her bed --- and she is not the one who owes restitution. Not at all. Unfortunately, there is no restition that a man can possibly make to his children for raping and violating them.

I have known women who followed this sort of advice. They cannot understand why their daughters, the rape victims of the man that their own mothers are so eager to invite back into their homes, refuse to visit even on holidays. Once grandchildren come along, the all-too-forgiving wives cannot understand why their daughters say, "There is no way that I'm going to let that man anywhere near my daughters. He will not rape them the way he raped me." Is that unforgiving? No --- it is being a good mother. It is doing what mothers should do in keeping their children from harm and bad company.

Were my children to be assaulted, abused, or raped, I would not betray them by inviting the tormentor into my home, no matter how duped I had previously been by this criminal pervert. If I was sick enough to still have my own misguided feelings of fondness for this vile jerk ("But he was always nice to me and, besides, he's awfully cute for a pedophile!") I would certainly set them aside out of love and motherly duty for my children, no matter their ages, no matter how many years transpired since the rapes, no matter how many crocodile tears the pedophile wept.

Pedophiles tend to offend repeatedly...again and again and again. I recently heard of one case where the pedophile had not only raped his daughters but, after alledgedly being "rehabilitated" in jail, had gone on to rape his grandchildren as well as assorted nieces, nephews, and neighbor children --- all because his wife had insisted on welcoming him back to the family and giving him access to more victims.

Will God reward you for allowing your husband to go on molesting the very children you are supposed to protect? Not at all. It is one thing to be a martyr; it is another thing to be an accomplice to pedophilia. Yes, God hates divorce. But He certainly allows it in the case of adultery --- and it's time some Christians stopped pretending that child molestation is somehow a lesser sin.

Shame on Michael Pearl.

10 comments:

  1. I had not heard of Michael Pearl until I read your blog. But he is both wicked and stupid: a dangerous combination.

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  2. I have profound respect for your interchange with Mr. Carlton. My gratitude for your sharing. The stakes are high: CHILDREN.

    We are having a similar conversation: www.Choosinghome.com/blog

    Blessings on you, Rebecca.

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  3. This is why I initially stopped supporting Michael and Debbi Pearl. I was uncomfortable with their materials, and knew they hadn't worked for us, but I felt like this advice clearly crossed the line into territory that clearly would put children in danger every time it was followed.

    I wrote about it here:
    http://ourhomeschool.blog-city.com/the_pearls_are_wrong.htm

    More Blessings from this mom and blogger who appreciates your support through blogging and comments on other blogs! ;-) I must say, I found it incredibly insulting to have my salvation questioned because of my lack of support for the Pearl's, and my giving support to the boycott.

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  4. This is rather sick and out of touch. Sex offenders rarely get that kind of time. Often times, it is difficult to get anything to stick at all. Now, they build up their whole child rearing advice on two verses out of proverbs. Can we also take the two verses in the OT that say that those who commit incest shall be cursed...and cut off from the people...and deduce that it is evil and deserving of divorce? Granted the incest stuff is about brothers and sisters, bur certainly fathers and daughters would be worse? Isn't this adultery of the worst sort?

    A molested child suffers merely from seeing his/her abuser. No touch need take place. And to see him in the arms of mom? That might mess the kid up even more.

    Of course this comes from someone whose husband would be lucky to make it alive to trial if he were to do such a thing. Divorce would be a great mercy...so I might be unduly biased.

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  5. only a pedophile would write that. you know, it i know it, sane people everywhere know it. he is a big nasty bearded perv. ewwww. he just looks like the santa molester, doesn't he? he is so nasty just to look at. yuck.

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  6. My parter was sexually abused by her father from age 1 - 16. The only reason it stopped is because the mother walked in and saw here hushand having sex with her 16 year old. Even sicker, he had sex with her in front of her little sister (they shared a room). I am not sure what he all did to her. Witnessing is horrible enough.

    Anyway....the molester and the mother are still married today. The little sister won't have anything to do with her parents. My partner does see her mother and father on occasion, they live faraway. I don't understand what kind of mother would choose herself, a pedofile and her own children.

    I don't understand why my partner keeps contact. But I don't pry either. She has PTSD and I don't want to trigger anything. Still, I don't understand.

    Also, there is another sister who was not exposed to the abuse. She lives in town as the molester. She allows her children around him. I like her but I know she has no idea the impact of the abuse on her sister.

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  7. I can fully understand why you chose to post anonymously. I just wish I could contact you and dialogue further.

    It baffles me how a mother could want any contact with the person who sexually abused her child, let alone stay married to him. Sadly, many do. Many families react, when sexual abuse is disclosed, by rallying around the perpetrator and ignoring, ostracizing, or verbally attacking the victim. It makes no sense to me.

    As someone who suffers from PTSD, I know how difficult that can be. My heart goes out to your partner, and to you. May she find healing as you continue to love and support her.

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  8. Can you cite this source please? I need it for a class and want to make sure that I have correct sources/quotes and not just "hearsay".

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  9. The best mercy any incestuous pedophile should be able to hope for is to die a slow lonely painful death, absolutely unforgiven.

    We must sometimes resist the urge of punishing them more directly.

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  10. Please put that paragraph in context. Read the full article.
    http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/articles/marriage-family/husbandwife-relations/article-display/archive/1999/september/01/abusive-husband/

    I used to tgink Michael Pearl was crazy. Until I listened to his sermon called ” when forgiveness is a sin”, completelin the context of pediphiles
    My father molested his own children and this made since to me. It gave me the freedom to kick him out of my life forever.

    Listen to that here:
    http://nogreaterjoy.org/shop/when-forgiveness-is-sin-download

    Yes I do not aggree with everything he says but he is out to protect children and promote marriage. Thank you for trying to expose false doctrine. My family was apart of one ( Jonathan lindvahl) but Michael pearl is a human being with faults as well as great wisdom

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